Notable Quotable:

Notable Quotable:

Remember, folks: whenever a woman says "die for me because you are a man," just look her in the eye and say "my body, my choice."

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Making Hay...

Or perhaps beating a dead horse.

Judging by the overwhelming response to my Anonymous Letter post, it seems I struck a nerve.  (9,000 hits!  On my blog???)  So I've decided to expand on the topic.  The post touched on several important issues, without exploring any of them in depth.  Indeed one commenter suggested that with some documentation and a change of tone, it could be rather scholarly.  I replied that it's already been done.

Then the gears started to turn.

Perhaps it needs to be done again, and in one place.  I'm going to dig up documentation for (and possibly against) every claim I made in that article, and write a series of posts and/or a book.  I would love some suggestions: Stats, studies, "education initiatives," anecdotes, individual cases, observations, and most of all, valid criticism.

If you have something to say, please leave a comment or email me at

I welcome your opinions.  (Unless you're a troll screeching, "NAWALT!")

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

On "Rape Culture"

(I didn't say "Rape;" I said "Rape Culture")

Courtesy of Dean Esmay at A Voice for Men, starring the inimitable Typhon Blue,

A moving, important piece on the rampant rapey culture of rapey rapiness, for the children.

Monday, October 22, 2012

deti Says:

"And women wonder why men don’t trust them."

Sunshine Mary at The Woman and the Dragon, found a  real winner on a site devoted to cheating.  This one is a Rationalization Hamster on steroids; her virtue is palpable!

"My husband is a sensitive caring man with soft features. The men who fathered my children are much better looking, more masculine, and healthier than my hubby. If you were to ever meet my husband, you would agree that he is not the ideal man to mate with, but he would be a good dad."

I cheated on my husband to secure better genes for my children

Is this "Karen" broad and outlier, an extreme?  Maybe, but I have two much more important questions:

1. Where did "Karen" ever get the idea that she is entitled to the "ideal" of one man's money and another man's sperm?

2. If her husband ever learns the truth, what are the chances he can walk away from this depraved skank and her bastard children, with his assets intact?

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Explaining the "Anonymous Letter" to a Girl who *Almost* Gets it.

I received two comments on My Anonymous Letter post from a young lady named Brittany.  I think she has her head on pretty straight, but she has missed a few subtleties.  Here are her comments and my response (which was so long I had to divide it into two comments.)  She's clearly pretty bright and observant; she sees what is happening around her, but like most people, she hasn't taken that next step to seriously consider why it is happening.  At some point in previous comments I made it clear that feminism is not the sole cause of everything wrong with modern society; however, feminism aggravates nearly every other factor.  Addressing those other factors will change nothing unless we address feminism as well.

This post is flawed only in the essence that you're blaming the women for kicking out the men who leave because they want to. The children raised by single mothers not because mom's standards are too high but because they weren't high enough. If those single moms had perhaps picked better men... they wouldn't be alone.

So let's set a few things straight mom. I'm a college educated small business owner who is head over heels in love with my best friend and business partner. He is an honorable, respectful man, who uplifts me and is always in my corner. He is charismatic, brilliant, attractive and cares for me through all my faults. I met him because I have high standards. I met him because I am strong and powerful. I met him because I waited for someone better than the last one. My standards aren't very high either, as a woman I want to be respected, I want to be intellectually stimulated as well as physically, I will not tolerate abuse of any form and I don't care if a man is rich, he just needs ambition. Unfortunately in my age bracket (I am 24) I had to start dating a man 7 years older than myself to even find what I need in a partner. Someone who actually behaves like an adult. Now I will say since your son was in the military he's probably got a better head on his shoulders than most men who are 20 but 20 year old males are usually barely out of puberty and still trying to get laid at any and all occasion.

Young men these days are rude, overly aggressive, and often perverse in seeking out females. Everyday I walk through my town men make disgusting comments to me about my body. When I go to the gym they follow me around. At my job I've had men attempt to pick me up while their wives were 4 feet away. This is so common that I find any man walking up to me to be threatening after living in this city for a few years. I don't go to bars because I don't want men trying to dry hump me on the dance floor. There are slim pickings when it comes to ambition these days as well. Many men in my community seemed to have finished high school and are just... done trying to be better. (I'm not talking about skilled workers, I've known some seriously talented auto repairmen who made quite a lot of money). It's not the paycheck that deters me, it's the lack of interest in doing anything other than working at Whole Foods as a cashier. I did try it though, dating people who didn't have my level of ambition and it ended because I was heading up and they were stagnant. There are plenty of men for women like me though, and just as many women who lack ambition and can work the check out line too.

It is NOT just the state of women but... you have a point in your post about some things. The brilliant wonderful man I love? While I know he cares for me and he's not leaving soon, I also know that he is hesitant to jump in when it comes to this relationship and I know it's because he had a horrible time with the last person he committed to who was the kind of woman you mentioned here, only she was nearly 40. There ARE many hateful women who are dealing with some serious internal issues and take it out on not just their men but the world. You also forget that some women are hard and unyielding because their lives have also been hard and unyielding. Their tough exteriors hide a pain built up through decades.

For the women who want to control men, instead of stand beside them as an equal? This post will do nothing but put them on defense. It's a multi-faceted problem that has nothing to do with feminism. I believe that women have the right to go after big goals and we shouldn't have to be held back because we're the fairer sex. That doesn't mean my goal is to emasculate or crush a man in my quest for power. I want my man to be JUST as powerful as I am, if not more. I want him to be just as ambitious, if not more.
Brittany a 2nd time.

I hope you get that I'm just saying that there are many MANY brilliant, dedicated, upright and honest women out there who are feminists and aren't trying to ruin men's lives but make sure our own lives are fulfilling and long lasting with the people we love and care for. It's a hard line to walk but it's thoroughly possible and the men who love us understand that we can be both tough and loving.
This was my response:
Thanks for your comment. I suspect you are a NAWALT.
Do you realize though, that your objections to my post actually substantiate it beautifully?

You said: “If those single moms had perhaps picked better men... they wouldn't be alone.” 

Who are these women who pick lousy men when good men are available? They are deluded Princess wannabes who believed that they could turn that Bad Boy into Princes. Then they blame the Bad Boys for not following the script. The family court system encourages and assists them in this endeavor. Who taught them that? Feminism. Feminism tells girls that they can “do anything,” and anyone who tells them otherwise is a misogynist. The reality is, a woman has an obligation to her offspring (and to her own future happiness) to choose her partner wisely. However thanks to feminism’s mandated redistribution of wealth, women who choose UNwisely, don’t suffer the true consequences – they and their children don’t starve. Sure, their feelings might be hurt, and they might be poorer than they had wished, and their children will have a radically increased chance of ending up mentally ill/unable to be productive/in prison, but one of the many delusions promoted by feminism, is that any old grrrl can overcome such hardships because she can do ANYTHING.

You said: “Unfortunately in my age bracket (I am 24) I had to start dating a man 7 years older than myself to even find what I need in a partner.”

NO KIDDING! Go read this post and watch this video. Pay attention to the part near the end where the class notes how their productivity/ambition decreased after just ONE DAY of “discrimination.”  These unambitious and crude men you meet, have been discriminated against throughout their entire lives. The VERY BEST of them will overcome that handicap in their late 20’s; many will never overcome it. Let me guess. Your SO is confident in his masculinity, right? Not cocky and reckless, not rebellious and reactionary, confident. Look around you. Where are his role models? Who teaches young boys and men that masculinity and masculine leadership (trust me, the two are inseparable) is GOOD? Nobody. According to feminism, men are good for sexual recreation, sperm donation, building bridges, and dying in battle. In every other endeavor, they are expected to rein in their masculine leadership and allow the ladies to run the show. I have no idea how any of them manage to function under this handicap; their hands are tied behind their backs, yet they are pilloried for not excelling. And those who do excel, can have everything taken away in a moment, according to the whims of any woman they know.
You said: “Young men these days are rude, overly aggressive, and often perverse in seeking out females.”

Yup. That’s the testosterone speaking. Feminism tries to pretend it can contradict biology, but it can’t, can it? Men will be men, and look at the mess we have made by not teaching them to channel their masculinity in a productive manner. Because remember, throughout their entire lives they have been taught that there IS NO productive use for masculinity – masculinity must be bad because masculine behaviors are punished starting in pre-school. Again, who are their role models? Thugs, Playas, and feminist approved pussy-whipped beta-providers.

You said: “There ARE many hateful women who are dealing with some serious internal issues and take it out on not just their men but the world.” 

Yes there are, and feminism encourages them to be hateful, because it lets them get away with it by shaming men into supporting them anyway. And two generations into mass fatherlessness, millions of young women AND men never learned not to be hateful. (Of course, the young men get punished for it anyway.)
The bottom line is that feminism deeply corrupts female nature. Hypergamy, which is necessary to species survival, is deeply ingrained in the human female’s psyche. In a world full of surplus resources, with laws that channel those resources toward women (and encourages them to use them for themselves, rather than for their children) hypergamy results in mass depravity on the part of women.

You said: “For the women who want to control men, instead of stand beside them as an equal? This post will do nothing but put them on defense.” 

I’m not trying to “instruct” the willfully ineducable. I’m just telling them WHY they’re miserable and alone in their ignorance. They think men are to blame; I’m telling them the truth.

Friday, October 12, 2012

ADA Mary Kellett's Corruption: The Highlights

Once Upon A Time,
There was a man named Mr. Filler.  He threw a cup of water on his crazy wife.  For that heinous crime he was charged with rape, he was tried twice, and finally convicted of a misdemeanor.  (Bangor Daily News, Aug 11, 2011)  He has been sentenced to 21 days in jail.

This is where the story gets interesting.  

Hancock County ADA Mary Kellett was the prosecutor in this case, and she is facing disbarment for her conduct in this case.  Yet she has managed to schedule Mr. Filler's jail sentence to coincide with her disbarment hearing - so he won't be available to testify against her.  

Yes, you read that right:  Mary Kellett is trying to prevent the STAR WITNESS from testifying against her, by imprisoning him during her hearing.  This is happening in Maine.  In the United States of America.

Please read the following articles, along with the links to verification sources.  Then please contact the people who have the power to stop this travesty and fire a corrupt public official.  Please inform them that the residents of Maine are rather fond of their Constitutional rights and protections, including the rights to due process and protection from political imprisonment.  I also ask you to contact the news media in the region and ask them why they're not covering a scandal of this magnitude.  Please also contact the advertisers who fund the local news media, and tell them that coverage of such corruption is important to you, their paying customers.  You don't even have to sit down and compose original letters.  Print this article and snail-mail it to them or fax it to them.  Attach it to an email.  Call them on the phone and ask what they intend to do about Mary Kellett.  Believe me, they know all about her; they're just hoping YOU don't know.


Per DA Carletta Bassano’s demand Filler to be held at undisclosed jail during Kellett’s August 30-31 disciplinary hearing."

"In a small county of only 50,000 people, as many as 4 men per month have been indicted on multiple counts of Rape, each carrying up to 30 years in prison."
The Modern Day Witch Trials of Fathers and Men
     (That's a LOT of "rapists" in small community...)

"Asst. DA Mary Kellett advised the jury that the defense failed to prove that Mr. Filler did not commit the acts he was accused of."
Persecution of Valdek Filler
     (Yep.  She actually said that!)

"This is an utterly transparent attempt by the office of District Attorney Carletta Bassano to intimidate Filler out of testifying against Kellett. "
AvfM Calls for Action

"Maine prosecutor Mary Kellett will be facing the music with the Maine Overseers of the Bar. Kellett has been recommended for disciplinary action on the recommendation of a bar investigator for making improper statements to a jury... during the same precise time, Vladek Filler is scheduled to be jailed on a misdemeanor...  It was Fillers failed criminal prosecution on sexual assault charges that led to Kellett being investigated by the bar in the first place."
This Time it's for Real

" And there is also the recent event that Kellett conned a woman in another case to not testify on behalf of her estranged husband by convincing her he had killed his first wife.  That case was thrown out on Kellett’s misconduct when the judge found out what she did."
Motion for a New Trial

"Not for the children, but for who gets to own them. "
Ligia Filler Getting Coached on Making her /Story "Seem Real"

"Filler Faces Political Imprisonment."
This all goes down next week!!!

Did you read all that?  How's your blood pressure doing, hmm?  Do you feel like throwing up?  Or throwing anything you can reach?  Do you even believe it???  Please contact these people and remind them that they serve at your pleasure, not the other way around.

Please send emails a few at a time; Mass emails will probably be returned, as suspected spam.

***We are asking supporters to call on the Hancock County Court to free Vladek Filler and vacate his conviction on post-conviction review. The contact info is Hancock County Superior Court, 50 State Street, Ellsworth, Maine 04605 Phone: 207-667-7176 then press “0”.

***Call on the Board of Overseers of the Bar and the 3 member Grievance Panel to hold prosecutor Mary Kellett accountable by recommending her disbarment. Grievance Panel Members:  Chair M. Ray Bradford, Jr., Esq, Sarah McPartland-Good Esq and Norman A. Ross. Contact info: Board of Overseers of the Bar, 97 Winthrop Street, P. O. Box 527 Augusta, Maine 04332-0527. Phone: 207-623-1121 Fax: 207-623-4175 E-mail:

Maine House of Representatives, Hancock:
Ralph Chapman email  ,  home email
Elspeth M. Flemings  ,  home email
James S. Gillway email  , home email
David D. Johnson
Walter A. Kumeiga III  ,  home email
Louis J. Luchini
Richard S. Malaby  ,  home email
Howard E. McFadden  ,  home email
Kimberly C. Rosen  ,  home email
Beth P. Turner
Brian D. Langley
Kevin L. Raye
Richard W. Rosen
(Mailing addresses and phone numbers are available at )

US Senators:
Olympia Snowe
Susan Collins

US Representative, Maine 2nd district:
Mike Michaud

Maine Attorney General William J. Schneider - contact
Governor Paul LePage - contact

News Media:
Bangor Daily News - contact
WGME TV 13 - feedback
WABI TV 5 - contact
WVII channel 7 - contact
WLBZ channel 2 news director

Ellsworth Area Chamber of Commerce - email

Monday, October 8, 2012

Hormone Induced Whiiiiiinnnnnne

Gentlemen, don't bother reading this.  Post menopausal ladies, will this hormone crap ever end?????
I know, it's almost over.  Nine years of peri-menopause and one year of cheering almost every month.  Can it end already?  Please?  I've had a decent day.  I painted the third bookshelf, laundry is moving along.  Lowe's called and offered me a job starting at ten cents an our above what I requested (my ending library wage.)  WolfAlpha is working days for a few weeks; he came home early today and spent a couple of hours building shelves in my new storage room in the basement, then he cooked his inimitable fried chicken and mashed potato salad.  He sat down in front of the TV with the volume cranked up and I wanted to scream and throw things!!!!!  I didn't even ask him to turn it down because I knew I wouldn't be able to keep the edge out of my voice.  I closed the office door and put in earplugs, and still simmered for almost half an hour.  There's no reason for this - I know it's hormones and absolutely nothing else.  

I hate being angry; it almost hurts physically.  When something sets me off, I go into high gear trying to solve the problem, or to remind myself that there's nothing I can do about it.  But this?  There's nothing to fix!  Nothing to accept!  Nothing to out-think.  There's no way to calm myself down because I can't address the trigger - it's pure emotion.  Booze helps.  Whoop-de-doo!  Fight chemicals with more chemicals?  If this were to happen more than a couple of times in the past year, I'd be a raging drunk.

So yay for me.  I held my tongue, plugged in the Ipod, and I'm sipping some Grand Marnier.  I'm already calmer now, but worn out.  I really could do without this.

New Addition to 'Laugh Out Loud' on My Sidebar

Three Posts from The Adaptive Curmudgeon's Blog.  Every word is pure gold.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Despite Evidence To The Contrary, I Am Not Crazy

Here’s what my neighbor would have seen yesterday. Assuming, of course, I had neighbors, which I don’t.
I went charging out of my house at full tilt and stopped in the yard to shout “what’s the matter, not getting laid?”. Then I spun around three times while waving my arms and making a sound like this “Yeeghgh Blah Ploot Gnuff Errak”. Undeterred I sprinted to the woodpile, grabbed a perfectly innocent piece of wood and hurled it in a high arc onto the grass. Angrily I stomped back to my house only to return with a shotgun, wave it around a bit, aim at the inert piece of firewood, and pump two rounds into it (fatally wounding the wood). Then, smiling, I laughed uncontrollably for a full minute before hurling the wood over the fence and returning to my house.
Everything I did made sense.  In my next post all will be made clear.

Despite Evidence To The Contrary, I Am Not Crazy (Part II)

I was minding my own business when one of my roosters went to Defcon 4. Roosters only go berserk for a few reasons:
  • They feel like it.
  • A hen is missing.
  • A legitimate threat looms
  • The dog is sleeping peacefully and that’s unacceptable.
  • Space rays have shorted the rooster’s two brain cells.
I stepped out to investigate. The rooster was fluttering around the yard and squawking. It reminded me of the children’s story. Chickens (both roosters and hens) do indeed squawkexactly as if the the sky was falling. I get it.
I didn’t see any raccoons, hawks, or polar bears. What was the big deal? I noticed all the hens had abandoned him and were nowhere to be found. I joked aloud; “What’s the matter, not getting laid?”
Just then a hawk blasted out of nearby brush. My day had just gotten interesting.
The hawk had appeared only twenty feet away. It had been in a waist high bunch of thistles and my presence did nothing to spook it. It was closing like a missile. The rooster was toast!
I admire a good rooster; they’re obnoxious little monsters but they’ve got heart. This one was going to keep sounding the alarm and mortal danger wasn’t going to deter him. He’d probably go toe to toe with a wolverine if he thought it was necessary. He’d known the hawk was in the bushes yet he’d been warning the hens to clear out rather than wisely running for his life. I wonder if he’d deliberately made himself the target of the hawk’s interest to buy the hens’ escape? (Ladies, here’s an important tip. Just like roosters, a human male will face death bravely and without hesitation if that’s part of his job duties. Provided, just like a rooster, he gets unlimited sex with the job. I’m just sayin’.)
Rather than let the rooster meet his maker, I stepped between the hawk and his target. The hawk didn’t see me as a threat and aimed to make a run inches below my armpit. I made a pathetic wimpy squealing sound when I realized this. Half in defense of the rooster and half wondering what talons could do to a grown man, I started waving my arms and shouting. The hawk banked hard and circled an arm’s breadth away. The rooster, brave but not stupid, hauled ass around me too.
We did three rotations like that. Rooster scampering like death was after him. Death orbiting me in a real life demonstration of flying prowess. Me waving my arms and gibbering like an idiot.
I’d become the hub of a wild and flapping universe of chaos. This would not do. It was time to use that monkey brain of mine and disrupt things.
On the third spin I jumped directly into the path of the orbiting hawk. The hawk barely managed to avoid crashing into my stomach. It flapped away to park on a fencepost thirty feet away. I’d thoroughly pissed it off. My only thought was that it hadn’t hooked my gut with a talon. Lucky me!
It glared at me. I glared back. The rooster was safely behind me so it squawked and glared at everyone. We had achieved d├ętente.
More in my next post…

Despite Evidence To The Contrary, I Am Not Crazy (Part III)

The hawk clearly intended to out wait the brave rooster and it’s imbecilic owner. After a few minutes I sprinted to the woodpile to grab a weapon. The instant I moved the hawk took flight. The chase was on again! The rooster squawked louder and sprinted for the safety of the truck. I grabbed a piece of firewood and hurled it. The log landed close enough to the hawk to make him call off the attack. Whew!
By now the hawk was on a closer fencepost; less than ten feet away. The rooster was under the truck but still sounding his alarm. (As if there was a hen left in the county that wasn’t hiding by now.) The dog in the house was trying to tear the wall down to rescue us all. A nearby barn cat was fast asleep. (Cats! They exist to piss me off!)
The hawk took flight and cruised around the back of the barn. I ran for the house to get my shotgun. I had no intention of shooting the hawk (I like their grace and there’s probably a million laws protecting them anyway). I just wanted to use the timeless and undeniable argument that is understood by everyone; “run like hell because I’ve got my boomstick!”
By the time I got back one of our turkeys was flapping across the yard with the hawk hot on it’s trail. All I could think was; “You’ve got to be kidding me!” The turkey was massive compared to the hawk. Our free range turkeys are sweet critters with the disposition of a kitten. Unfortunately they’ve got the brain of a cueball and the grace of a thrown brick. When chased by a hawk it went from clumsy to utterly unhinged. It was careening into the fence, the truck, tree trunks, and everything else. The hawk followed closely but hesitated here and there. I guessed that it had no idea what it would do if it actually caught a turkey over five times its size. The turkey, if it had a brain (which they don’t) could probably have turned around and eaten it.
The hawk, letting logic overcome bloodlust, realized the turkey was out of his league and veered toward the cat. Awesome!
Unfortunately the cat got with the program and shot off like lightning. It zoomed over the woodpile and straight up a tree. The hawk thought better of the cat and jetted toward my truck’s bumper where the rooster was still carrying on.
I tried to find a spot where nothing was in the way. It wasn’t easy since the whole lawn was in chaos. Then I noticed the block of firewood lying on the grass.
Boom! I scored a direct hit on immobile firewood. That got everyone’s attention!
The turkey let out a sound exactly like Gilbert Godfrey having a heart attack. The cat poofed up like an exploding dustmop and practically tried to chew it’s way into the tree. The rooster (inexplicably) left the safety of the truck and chased after the turkey. The dog in the house let out a war cry that could make paint peel. The hawk came to a screeching halt mid-air and briefly hovered while trying to decide what the hell to do next.
I racked the slide and fired again. Boom! You’ve got to double tap blocks of wood… you don’t want one coming back to life and getting’ ya!
That did it! The turkey, cat, and rooster were long gone. The hawk, having changed course against all laws of physics, was airborne but with no momentum. It was flapping hard to get moving. It really wanted to be somewhere else.
I racked the slide again. The firewood was doomed and I was just wasting ammo for fun. The hawk had learned the meaning of boomstick and was desperate to get out of Dodge. It did an emergency jettison of extra baggage by taking an impressively huge crap. If it had flapped any harder it would have turned itself inside out.
I spared the firewood for no other reason than ammo ‘aint free and I was impressed by the hawk’s speed dump. Two seconds later the hawk had cleared the trees and was aiming to break the sound barrier. I wouldn’t be surprised if it didn’t stop for a hundred miles. It was clearly headed for somewhere safer, like Jupiter.
I’d literally scared the crap out of it!!! At the moment this seemed like the greatest feat ever accomplished in the entire history of mankind. I let out a hearty laugh. The cat (apparently stuck in the tree) made a pitiful sound. This only made me laugh harder.
It took a good minute or two to stop laughing. Then I picked up the wood (which had given it’s life for the cause!) and tossed it in the forest. I don’t need lead melting into my firebox.
It had been crazy but none of the animals got hurt. (The block of wood gets posthumous honors for making the ultimate sacrifice.) It had been a close shave. The rooster lost a few feathers but seemed to think he saved the day. The hawk will probably keep flying until it’s in another time zone. The cat (to my dismay) eventually came down from the tree. The turkey, having no brain at all, immediately forgot what had just happened and begged for treats. The hens came out a few minutes later. The dog hadn’t actually destroyed the house but it sure tried. Also, for no reason whatsoever, the dog seems to have the opinion that this was all caused by the turkey. (Which is why the dog has a future in politics.)
Everything I did made sense but it had been weird. It’s precisely why I shouldn’t have neighbors.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

25 Ways to Redefine the Phrase...

25 Ways to Re Define the Phrase 'Woman Up'

(Carlos Andres Gomez at The Good Men Project, has posted what amounts to a steaming pile of Churchian Rationalization Hamster excrement, 25 Ways to Redefine the Phrase 'Man Up.'  In response, Paul Elam at A Voice for Men, posted a hamsterlation of each of the 25 points.  He edited them to include what they really mean.)

GMP Guide to Do-It-Yourself Castration

AVfM's rousing rendition of, "Fuck You and the Horse You Rode In On."

And now, for your edification, the companion piece:

You've come a long way, Baby.  For the past fifty years We women have been given the benefit of the doubt.  Society has hobbled masculinity in order to give women a boost in all matters legal, economic, social, educational, and even religious.  We're grown up now, independent and empowered, so it's time for us to Woman Up.  Come on, we can do this, ladies.  Let's show those men that we're willing to make the effort to be worthy of their love and devotion.  We can be everything men tell us they need us to be.

Be a Peacemaker.  Drama is not peaceful.  Don't get all bent out of shape every time someone suggests that perhaps you could do better.  Quit picking petty fights and initiating power struggles with your significant other; he finds it tiresome.  Stop sabotaging your friends and co-workers.  You can be "better" than them by improving YOURSELF; you don't need to put them down.

Don't Leave the Tears on your Face.  See above.  When your hormones get the best of you, or someone says something hurtful, and you "lose it," get it back ASAP.  Mourning in private, during and after a genuine tragedy, is an age old but largely forgotten tradition.  Reclaim it.  For your garden variety miseries-blown-out-of-proportion, either for effect or because you have no self discipline, dry your eyes and get over it already.  That's how grown-ups roll.

Communicate.  I know you think you're good at this, but you could use a few pointers.  Nobody you know is a mind reader; if you want or need something, ask for it.  Explicitly.  No subtle hints, no demuring - 'oh, it's nothing.' no dirty looks or heavy sighs.  Don't expect it if you won't ask for it.  If you're "testing" your man, stop it already, see Be a peacemaker.  Also, keep it relevant; the words, "Well, I feel..." should never be spoken in an official, professional meeting.  Your feelings are not relevant.  Succinct and direct would be nice as well, but I think that might be pushing the envelope.

Be a Great Parent.  If you don't have to work outside the home, don't.  If you do have to work outside the home, find a family-friendly job, preferably part time.  I know, the wages are usually low, and child care is expensive.  That's the point.  Get a job that requires little or no childcare, and raise your own children.  Continue your education part time or join a gym or club.  It will keep your mind sharp and make you practice speaking like an adult, which you should be doing with your children anyway. (Remember, the goal here is to teach them how to become adults, not really big children.)  Learn to say, "No," calmly and with confidence.  If you become emotional because you let your kids push your buttons, you're no longer in charge.

Forgive.  Remember that time your new young husband ruined your favorite sweater because he didn't notice the "hand was/dry flat" label?  Don't ever bring it up again.  When he forgot your anniversary?  Accept his apology and move on.  Your overbearing mother or your hyper-competitive sister?  If you need to create some distance to prevent future slights, do it.  Leave the past in the past and make a more peaceful future.

Cook.  Not Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, not pre-made microwave meals from the grocer's freezer (OK, maybe once a week.)  Nutritionally balanced real meals.  Cookbooks are easy to read.  If your schedule is crammed too full (which is a problem all its own) spend a weekend cooking a month's worth of casseroles to keep in the freezer.

Spend Quality Time with Your Family.  Log off of Facebook. Turn off the TV and your phone.  Have meals together.  No Ipods.

Change a Diaper.  No really.  Many of you actually need to be told.  Duh.

Be Flexible.  The sun's going to come up tomorrow whether you crossed everything off your to-do list or not.  You can't control everything so quit trying.  You CAN control two things: what you say and what you do.  You may predict likely responses, but the outcomes are out of your hands.  Deal with it, and adapt.

Be Responsible.  Learn to manage your money.  Learn to manage your time.  Fulfill your promises and fix your mistakes.  Excuses don't fix anything.

Advocate for Men.  Your husband risked everything he will ever have when he married you, because you can take it all away on a whim.  Show him some respect in public and in private.  Next time your BFF rolls hr eyes and tells you about that "creepy" guy who flirted with her, tell her she's full of shit.  He may be unappealing or even repellent to her, but that doesn't justify her use of derogatory slurs.

Be Gentle.  And feminine.  And sweet.  Nobody likes a coarse, vulgar ball-buster.  Seriously.

Mentor a Child.  You can start with your own.

Be Healthy.  Drop those extra pounds.  You'll look better and you'll feel better, and you'll be far less likely to raise obese children.

Hold Yourself Accountable.  You might as well be the first to do so.  You're a woman so nobody else is allowed to.

Value Your Partner's Sexual Needs.  Sex is not always going to be fairy-tale perfect.  Most men have a higher sex drive than most women, and they tend to crave variety.  Unless you're sick, accommodate him even if you're not really in the mood.  Even a quickie or a hand/blow job.  It's not much of a sacrifice, and you'll both be glad you did.  There's rarely a good reason not to.  Oh, and let's get one thing clear.  Sex is not a weapon.  Don't ever withhold it to manipulate him; it's petty, selfish and childish, and we're Strong Responsible women, remember?

That's not 25, is it?  The problem with Gomez's list is that it's prime bullshit.  It's a bunch of shaming tactics based on weak male stereotypes.  However, just because I can't make much use of a useless list, doesn't mean I'm finished.  With a little help from commenters at AVfM, I came up with a few more:

If You're Going to Dress to Fuck, then Fuck.  Good women don't tease.

If You Cajole Your Husband into Buying a Bigger House than He Wants, Clean it Yourself.  It's your dream house, not his.  You make your own dream come true, and remember to thank him for footing the bill.

Do it Yourself.  If you can't, be prepared to show respect and gratitude to those who do it for you.  Don't ever expect a man to carry your water simply because you're a woman.

Behave Like an Adult.  No sneaky shit.  If you have to hide the bill, you spent too much; own it, it's yours.  No temper tantrums protesting reality (I'm looking at you , Slutwalkers...)  No renegging on promises.  A man is only as good as his word, and so is a woman; you follow through, or you are unreliable.  Grownups are reliable.  No exceptions, no excuses.

Reject Baseless Fears.  The TV is lying to you.  So are your magazines.  So are your politicians.  So is your church.  If they can convince you to live your life in fear of men, strangers, cars, the "wage gap," guns, terrorists, Hell, MRSA, gays, last year's fashions, tap water and bottled water, they can sell you reassurance.  And if you believe them, they have already sold you drama.  Quit buying it.  Children are naive and ignorant, and they need grownups to teach them.  You are a grownup.  Teach yourself, then teach your children.

THINK.  (from Sasha) Pause when your friends tell you to 'follow your feelings,' and consider the impact of your behavior.  Actions have consequences.

Show a Little Humility.  Your Inner Goddess is a myth.  Think of her as an imaginary friend, like the one you had as a child.  Nobody else can see her.  They may play along with you and pretend she's real, but so you really want to be patronized like a child?  Don't expect to be treated well by anyone, and thank everyone who bothers to treat you well - it's a favor, not their duty.

Fight Your Own Battles.  It's not your boyfriend/ husband's job to start a fight with someone who hurt your feelings or offended your delicate sensibilities.  Autonomous independent adults can't afford delicate sensibilities.

Show Loyalty and be Loyal.  Don't badmouth your husband, boyfriend, family, employer or friends.  If they are in your life, it's because you chose to put them there.  If trash talk is all you can come up with when discussing them, what does that say about your judgment?  Additionally, if you want their loyalty, you'd better be prepared to earn it with yours.

I could go on all day here, but 25 is a good start.

L'Oreal commercials like to tell us "..we're worth it," but they never tell us how or why.  And yet we believe them.  How about we hold ourselves up to some objectively measurable criteria, the same way men do, and prove that we're worth it.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

The Judge Lori B. Jackson Highlight Reel

Judge Lori B. Jackson doesn’t want Harrison County, or anyone else, to know what she’s doing behind closed doors.

A Voice for Men - Articles on Circuit Court Judge Lori B. Jackson, Harrison County, WV Family Court:

“Petition to Impeach Judge Lori B. Jackson”
*Not only has Judge Jackson clearly violated state guidelines, she has done so knowingly at the expense of two minor children, effectively delivering them into the custody of the person abusing them.

*All of the evidence, including video and audio recordings, demonstrated the fact that Tina Taylor Kirk was an abusive alcoholic who engaged in an unrelenting pattern of physical, emotional and psychological abuse of her children.
*Judge Jackson reviewed all this evidence and failed to contact child protective services, and subsequently ruled to deliver both children from that marriage into the custody of their abuser.
*Judge Jackson even went as far as ordering that the video evidence of Tina Taylor Kirk's child abuse be gagged and withheld from further viewing by authorities.
“Child Abuse from the Bench”

“Judge Lori B. Jackson Seeks to Gag AVfM”
*In a stunning move, Jackson issued an order that Joel Kirk appear in her court this Thursday, October 4, 2012 at 9 A.M., effectively giving him two days to secure council
*She also knows that there are few to no attorneys in Kirk’s immediate area suitable to represent him
*Similarly, Jackson also wants to intimidate AVfM into cowering and surrendering our rights to free speech, as well as freedom of the press.
“Circuit Judge Delays Ruling Kirk Custody Case”
*On Friday September 21, the West Virginia Fifteenth Judicial Circuit court decided to delay final judgment until further notice on Joel Kirks appeal to regain custody of his children.  This comes after an activism drive spearheaded by A Voice for Men has given much publicity to the case spurring action on the internet and locally in Harrison County WVA.
*…Tina Kirk’s lawyers approached Lt. Col. Kirk with an offer for full custody of their children in exchange for $288,000.  He has not entertained this offer to sell the children.

“Tina Kirk ‘Grieves’ Losing Custody”
*Tina Taylor Kirk stated on the court record and in writing that she was receiving treatment for alcohol abuse at Celebrate Recovery, a “Christ-centered 12-step recovery program.” She also testified throughout the entire court proceedings (before these photos surfaced) that she had not drunk any alcohol since June 28, 2009, the night Lt. Col. Kirk captured his wife’s drunken and violent rampage against him and their children on film.
“Shattered” mother and her “grief counselor”

*…these photos of Tina Taylor Kirk and friends, knocking back beer after beer, were taken only 5 days after being ordered to have no contact with her children.
*Tina told the children that she was equally shattered by her separation from them, but the photos below tell a different story…
*As image after image loaded onto the screen, the children became more and more devastated. The first words out of the son’s mouth were, “Who are those men?” The daughter saw the date-stamps on the photos and said, “Hey mom’s in a bar and it’s right when she left here.’”
*Judge Jackson continues to enable this child abuser and, in the process, has become a child abuser herself.

“Interview with Lt. Col. Joel Kirk”
“The Dishonor of Judge Lori B. Jackson”
*Judge Lori B. Jackson, of the Eighteenth Family Court Circuit for Harrison County, West Virginia has used her gavel, her authority under the law, to sadistically bludgeon Lt. Col. Kirk, and has sentenced his two children to being placed in the custody of their mother, Tina Taylor Kirk, a proven and even more sadistic abuser.
*The report documents Tina Taylor Kirk’s attempts to intimidate and threaten personnel charged with investigating the well-being of her children, her attempted coercion of her children into lying on her behalf, trying to force them to mold their reality to cover her lies and to fit her embittered and malicious agenda. It is all laid out in clear, heartbreakingly painful detail.

Oh wait!  There’s more!

Virginia for information regarding any of the questions posed by Dr. Palmatier in this article. The safety of the Kirk children continues to hang in the balance, and we could use your help in identifying the source of the obvious conflict of interest guiding decisions from Lori B Jackson’s courtroom. If you have any information that would be helpful to this case, please make contact with Paul Elam at Publishers note: AVfM now makes an appeal to the citizens of Harrison County, West You need not disclose your identity. AVfM will protect your anonymity. Thank you. PE.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Judge Jackson is Getting Desperate. Let's Shut the Broad Down!

Judge Lori B. Jackson seeks to gag AVfM

"In a stunning move, Jackson issued an order that Joel Kirk appear in her court this Thursday, October 4, 2012 at 9 A.M., effectively giving him two days to secure council to represent him there. We happen to know that Judge Jackson is aware that Lt. Col. Kirk’s lawyer lives more than a two-hour drive from her court, and that the possibility of getting him there on such short notice would be near impossible. She also knows that there are few to no attorneys in Kirk’s immediate area suitable to represent him in this matter.
In fact, she tips her hand and demonstrates this awareness in a handwritten note to Snead on the order, informing her that Kirk would be in court representing himself. She decided, before the hearing was even scheduled, that Kirk would stand before her without legal representation."

This was my comment:

"So, Paul I guess that’s a “yes.”
As many of you know, last week I distributed by hand, over 100 AVfM flyers in Harrison County. {Paul, do I need to be there Thursday? (+voice recorder?) I *might* be able to swing it. I have a job interview in a few hours, and I might be working by the end of the week.} Here’s what I’m doing later today. I’m going to create a document with every link on the subject and a sexy headline or two; I’m also going to hit Google and find every publicly available email address in Harrison County (including Fairmont, just north and a good sized town.) If anyone wants the email list I’m going to create, let me know – it will be available later this afternoon."

I'll publish another post this afternoon, with every email and link I can find.  Feel free to make use of them!