Notable Quotable:

Notable Quotable:

Remember, folks: whenever a woman says "die for me because you are a man," just look her in the eye and say "my body, my choice."
TCM

Monday, November 11, 2013

End of a chapter

I've learned a lot in the last few months. About life, about hope, about loss, about grief. The one aspect of loss that most surprised me is how it messes with the perception of time. I became angry and panicky when autumn approached, feeling as if I wasn't supposed to continue through time without my husband. Normally time blends; the past eases into the present, which eases into the future. When a huge part of your life stops moving through time, forcing you to leave it behind, it can throw you off balance at your core. Adjusting to it is a slow process.

It feels like this big new pit in my life is changing shape. It's not as deep as it was a couple of months ago, but it has widened; I'm moving forward and carrying it with me by its edge, stretching it across the surface of time. I suppose it will eventually become a thin layer of my life, like an inch of rainwater spread over a big field as opposed to a small but deep lake. It will probably even absorb into the surface, always there but not always noticeable.

I'm closing on the house tomorrow and driving back to Hooterville Wednesday. Thursday is mostly business - driver's license and tags, and a haircut by Dave! A checkup at the doctor's office, and time with friends. Saturday I head up to The Frozen North. While I'm on the road, my parents will be too; SisterFed and SisterEMT are helping them move to SisterFed's town in the Wild West. I'm going to spend a few months at SisterEMT's apartment, and visit our parents from there. I'll also spend a bit of time in my hometown nearby and I might toddle on over to Sunny California to visit The Corporal. Somewhere in there I WILL be taking Captain Capitalism out for lunch!

http://captaincapitalism.blogspot.com/

Beyond mid-winter, I don't know, but that's OK. I don't need to find a paid job yet; I now receive a monthly pension payment and I have enough cash to live modestly for a couple of years if necessary (without touching my nest egg.) I have until next summer to decide whether or not I'll live in my rental house, and the Corporal is applying to his preferred university. I just might buy a house in CollegeTown, and oddly enough ;) The Corporal likes that idea - something about privacy and a garage for his motorcycle, plus a few home-cooked meals and a live-in laundress...

While I'm in the Frozen North I think I'll (re)develop an old job skill too. I tended bar for a while in college and I loved it, and I think that would be a good part-time job for me. I'm a night owl, and I suspect that a MHRA bartender in a college town could do a lot of good. Just sayin'. And I am SO looking forward to getting back into blogland and my work with A Voice for Men! The Coyote Shivers/Pauley Perrette/LA County Courts story is getting bigger, and Pauley and her pals are about to find themselves in some pretty hot water. Harassment, intimidation, perjury and corruption can come back and bite you in the ass, and all the money in Hollywood can't keep this story under wraps. I almost (but not quite) feel sorry for all the Hollywood "news" reporters who would give their eye teeth to get their hands on this story, but would lose their jobs if they published it. Additionally, I'll be starting on a rather huge behind-the-scenes project, but I can't say much about it yet. If we get it off the ground, it will immediately help a lot of men in dire need.

So today I will pack my suitcases and one or two small boxes. I never thought I'd be ready and willing to walk away from this future I had planned with WolfAlpha, but I need this weird state of limbo to end. Sorting through everything I own and putting his last few personal items where I can find them but not stumble upon them unexpectedly, has been good for me. I hope he doesn't mind a winter in the upper midwest, because I'll be carrying him around in my heart.

Onward.

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Crucifixion Friday Night

Alternate headline:
"ABC Inadvertently Opens Industrial Sized Can of Worms; Makes Gooey, Slimy Mess All Over MSM"

This Friday October 18, ABC's 20/20 will air Elizabeth Vargas' interview with Paul Elam, founder of A Voice for Men. ABC's goal is almost certainly to make Overlord Elam look like the Evil Kitten-eating Ogre we all know and love (check out the naked hostility on Elizabeth Vargas' face in the trailer video) but we at AVfM are thrilled to bits. ABC is sending millions of viewers to a world they never knew existed. Many will reflexively (and erroneously) screech, "Misogyneeeee!" but for many, it. will. click.

After 40 years the Men's Human Rights Movement is going mainstream. May institutionalized misandry die in a fire.

...don't forget to check out the comments section; the mods can't delete us fast enough!

I predict that initially this is going to blow up in ABC's face because ABC apparently doesn't see what millions of men and women see, but years from now people will look back and say, "Wow, that was gutsy, letting Paul Elam speak the unspeakable!"


{Personal update: I'm moving in 3 weeks, the house is almost packed and things are going smoothly. And I can't wait to see my friends in Hooterville, and my family!!!}




Monday, October 7, 2013

Saturday, September 21, 2013

Sold!

My house hit the Multiple Listings Service on Thursday, I had five showings yesterday and one today. This afternoon I accepted a very good offer; if all goes well we close before November. Good thing it's clean and nearly empty - it'll be a breeze to pack!

Guess I'm really moving forward now...

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Six weeks of sweat

The house is on the market. I've lost eighteen pounds. I hurt all over and my right hand goes numb when I grasp anything tightly. It's time to rest for a while.

Mac's last zinnia patch. One of his best.








Sunday, August 18, 2013

More pix from the Tank Farm

 

















Tank Farm!

I took Saturday off.  I didn't paint anything, I didn't sand anything, I didn't scrub anything, I didn't set one foot on a ladder or even on a step stool.

Old NFO had suggested a get-together at the American Wartime Museum's Open House in Nokesville, VA, and I thought some good old fashioned fun in the sun would be just the ticket. So I spent half a day wandering around with Old NFO and the Murphy's Law (owner of the world's most mischievous dog) taking pictures. My profound ignorance of all things military didn't stop me from being thoroughly impressed, and I have the good sense not to feel like an idiot for not knowing enough to even ask intelligent questions; I learned a long time ago to just shut up and listen when veterans get together and start talking. Oh, and northern Virginia is probably one of the best places in the world to find hundreds of extremely knowledgeable and dedicated military history enthusiasts and volunteers. They don't teach this stuff in schools.

So here is my very first attempt to upload a video I shot all by myself, and a bunch of photos of things that go Boom, things that go Vroom, and a few bits of entirely random Cool Stuff.



Had these been for sale, I would now own one.
Do whatever works.
Huh. Mine don't look like that. I'm pretty sure they never did.
$700. With the right holster, would it fit under a blazer?

Ooooh, pretty! Horsies!

Wanted: Very short driver.

Wiley Coyote was in the next tent waiting for his cue.

Various Awesomeness:






Aaaand since Blogger is a weenie and stinks, I will have to publish more "Various Awesomeness" in another post. Or two or five.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Calling all Honey Badgers!

After decades of ignoring and then mocking the men's rights movement, it appears that Those Who Control The Public Discourse have reached the stage of attempting to fight it. It is now being acknowledged that men and boys suffer a wee bit of discrimination due to a few possibly misguided and somewhat gynocentric laws, policies and recent shifts in Western culture. However the growing consensus among Those Who Know What's Good For Us, is that there's really no need for a men's movement; apparently men have no business advocating for themselves or each other, as there really is little need at all to advocate for men.  And there is certainly call for vulgarity, assertiveness or anything else that might offend anyone's delicate sensibilities.

As Cathy Young of the Boston Globe so eloquently states,

"Perhaps what the 21st century needs is not a women’s movement (which was once essential to secure basic rights) or a men’s movement, but a gender equality movement."

Really, Cathy? Really??? You think it's just fine for "gender equality" to be defined and dictated by those members of the "women's movement" who now have a death grip on our government, education system, media and culture?  The same people who redefined Rape Culture (along with the legal definition of "rape" itself) to almost entirely exclude male victims?  The same people who have quietly replaced the phrase "domestic violence" with the phrase "violence against women" in our cultural lexicon? (While simultaneously wringing their hands and crying,"What about the children?") The same people who initiated the Tender Years Doctrine as default policy in the family courts?  The same people who are angry at the military because (even some of the strongest and most dedicated) women can't meet the physical standards required for combat duty?  The same people who advocate for affirmative action because there aren't enough female CEOs and Senators, yet never complain that there aren't enough female coal miners, mechanics, trash haulers and commercial fishermen?  The same people who cheer when a Senator states (with a straight face, no less) that women and children are the primary victims of war because they lose their menfolk?  The same people who cheer and laugh when a world-famous TV personality giggles gleefully at the mental image of a penis in a garbage disposal? The same people who rant about FGM in third world countries, while circumcising their own sons?  The same people who demand (and demand funding for) endless reproductive "rights" women while telling men to "keep it in their pants" if they don't want to risk becoming parents? Cathy, Are you fucking serious????

If you're a woman who thinks Cathy Young is full of shit,  follow the link to A Voice for Men and consider signing your name to this article, because "We are not withering violets, afraid that our words won’t be accepted, our opinions not liked, and our methods not approved."


"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." M. Gandhi


We're getting there.

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Family Time

Corporal's leave is just about over, and his presence has been an immeasurable comfort to me.  The most difficult work (emotionally and physically) is done and I'm left with a neat, comprehensive list of tasks to keep me busy and focused until I sell the house and move.

Today we did a little family history.  My dad was born not far from here and recently he emailed me the address of his childhood home.  We looked it up on Google Maps and went for a drive:




These trees are in the back yard of the house across the street.  I wonder if he enjoyed their shade back in the early thirties...
Kinda cool.




(Any idea how the heck I managed to change the date on these photos?  I sure don't have a clue!)

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Gratitude, Tears, and Lots of Baby Steps

I am taking lots baby steps toward the future while Corporal and other members of my family take umbrella steps over and around me, settling the estate and getting ready to move back to Hooterville.  What we have collectively accomplished in days, would have taken me months on my own.  Mac knew we had raised a fine son, but these past two weeks would have blown his mind.  That young man has his head on straight and he can work like a machine.  The Marines are lucky to have him.  Many of our most urgent tasks have now been accomplished, and I find myself with a few quiet hours now and then.

It has been two and a half weeks since Mac's death. My wedding ring no longer feels "new" on my right hand, and today I changed my Facebook status to "Widowed" (does that make it more official?) Neither seems to make it more real. Having spent part of last year in a Commuter Marriage, I'm still half expecting a text telling me what time to meet him at the airport.

In spite of this wrenching loss, I think I'm one of the most fortunate people on this planet.  I spent twenty-five years married to a man I never deserved (no, I'm not being modest) and I have a family whose love, kindness and generosity defy description.  I also have more friends than I ever realized.  I am humbled and overwhelmed by the kindness and the offers of support and help that I have received from so many readers, both here and at AVfM, most of whom I have never met in person.  I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Emotionally I've been somewhat numb, out of necessity, but not completely shut down.  Back in early June, when Mac and I came home after his CT scan, and his doctor called to send him back to the hospital for admission, I was looking over his shoulder as he wrote down what they found on the scan.  (I have since thrown out that scrap of paper, but those words are forever etched in my mind.)  I knew right then what was coming but none of us knew how fast it would happen, and the panic attacks started immediately.  I hid most of my fear and grief from him because I didn't want him to worry about me - and he would, especially being too sick to offer me much comfort.  But I learned how to cry again.  I don't cry often and I rarely get upset, but there was no denying I had a lot to cry about and I couldn't pretend otherwise.  I spent those three weeks grieving, both for what he would face and for what I would face. Of course he hid his fears from me as well; I might try to convince myself that he had no idea what was happening in his body while we waited for a diagnosis, but I'd just be deluding myself.  He was hoping to regain enough strength to fight the cancer, at least for a while, but he knew where it was heading. And I now know that he was protecting me and carrying his burden even more quietly than I was carrying mine.  Like he always did.

It is just such realizations which bring the tears.  While stumbling through estate paperwork and attending to the many tasks I need to accomplish, I keep tripping over so many things he has done for my benefit, things he did without my knowledge, never expecting a word of thanks.  And I'm absolutely certain there is much more that I'll never know.  He never "kept score."  He never expected praise for his praiseworthy actions. He simply, reflexively even, did to the best of his ability, what he knew he needed to do.  Right up until hours before he died.  And not once since I've known him has he complained that it wasn't fair, even when it really wasn't fair.  Maybe he took pride in being a man I could take for granted, while I tried hard not to take him for granted.  I guess I'll never know, but I sure wish I could have at least a few more years to try to even the score, that score he never kept.  I know I was a pretty good wife, but he was a man who deserved so much more.

I probably won't be writing with my heart on my sleeve any more; it makes me uncomfortable anyway. I'll continue to move forward now, but a part of me will be kicking and screaming along the way for quite some time. I just don't want to leave him behind. I believe he's with me in spirit and I know that his personality has largely shaped my personality, so he'll never be entirely gone.  And I see much of him in our son.  I know that those ashes buried in a bronze box in his hometown are not what I treasure of him, but it was so hard to walk away from his grave.  My life is not empty or meaningless, and I suspect it never will be, but there's a Mac-shaped hole in my heart that I couldn't fill even if I wanted to. I'll have to get used to that.





Thursday, July 4, 2013

A Good Man Dies

That title should be read, not with dismissal, but with skepticism.  I subscribe to the school of though that recommends viewing with suspicion, anyone who puts an adjective in front of the word "man."  Such adjectives often imply a standard that may not be entirely honest.  I believe that a "good" man is just about any man who believes himself to be good, according to his own carefully considered standards.  There are many men though, who would be considered good by nearly everyone's standards, and my husband was among them.

June 30, 2013 was WolfAlpha's and my 25th wedding anniversary.  It was also the day he died.  He was 58 years old.  Six weeks ago he was working as usual, four weeks ago he saw his doctor to address what he thought was a stubborn case of hay fever, one week ago he received a definitive diagnosis of pancreatic cancer, and a few days later he died.  Early the next morning, our son arrived from Afghanistan.  Next week we will bury my husband's ashes beside his parents.

In spite of his flaws, twenty-five years with him was not enough; I've known all along I was lucky to have him.  He was a good man.  When he committed himself to anything, he committed himself fully, but he never let anyone tell him what was worth committing to.  He followed most of the rules because sometimes you have to go along to get along, but he has been known to occasionally follow those rules with open contempt and he never allowed anyone to believe they were putting one over on him.  He had few illusions and his Bullshit Detector was finely tuned - even with me.  Nobody manipulated him without his knowledge and consent.  He was strong, so strong, both mentally and physically.  Perhaps the nickname WolfAlpha was prophetic.  Like many a well-bred and well-trained police dog, he worked at his usual pace until he dropped, never letting a weakness slow him down.  I thank God he knew how to relax and enjoy life as fully, rather than waiting for a retirement that he dared not count on.

As a father he was both stern and affectionate.  He loved his son more than anything on earth, and he told him so often.  He also taught his son to be a man.  He taught his son that being a cog in someone else's machine is a just a part of life, but that being a cog would not define him if he chose to define himself.  WolfAlpha taught his son to define himself.

He taught me the same thing.  I would not be the person I am now if I had not married him.  I was vain and shallow and lacking direction when we married.  I had no idea what I wanted out of life, but he showed me what was worth having, and what was worth being.  And he gave me more than I ever deserved.  We did not have a "perfect marriage" or a "perfect love."  What we had grew stronger in our efforts to overcome its imperfections.

Rest in peace, Conard Brewer McCarley Jr.  I love you and I will miss you.




Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Facebook censorship begins. Wow, that was quick!

We weren't exaggerating.  This infographic was deleted by Facebook, from the A Voice for Men page:



→Here's the story.←

(Needless to say, I immediately shared it on my page...)

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Facebook Censorship Campaign

Ugh.  We knew this was coming, and here it is.  Here are two articles from A Voice for Men.

http://www.avoiceformen.com/feminism/feminist-lies-feminism/facebook-hates-women/

http://www.avoiceformen.com/mens-rights/its-on/

The gist of it:
On the surface, Facebook has agreed to censor posts that "promote" violence against women.  I'm mostly cool with that because FB shouldn't be obligated to publish posts that promote violence of any kind  But I have one huge issue with this policy: Who is going to DECIDE what content "promotes" violence against women?  Unfortunately we all know the answer.  It is the same →people← who label anything pro-male as hate speech.  It's the people who insist that when two drunk people have sex, one of them (not the woman) is a rapist.  It is the people who require male college freshmen to attend classes telling them that they are all rapists.

Awareness of serious discrimination against men is growing; every "moderate" feminist I've ever encountered believe there should be "more parity" in child-custody cases, or that lifetime alimony is utterly unnecessary, but until recently the discussion has always been filtered through the "women first" feminist view (which apparently justifies trashing men's Constitutional rights to due process.)  Both hateful radical feminists and corrupt feminist politicians, who dominate our schools, colleges and government (if you doubt that, look at what happens to any politician that publicly criticizes feminism) are terrified of losing control of the issue.  Billion and billions of tax dollars are theirs to lose and they know it.  And to them, censorship is the answer.

PLEASE go to →this Facebook page← and tell Facebook what you think of censorship.  And please check out the →A Voice for Men← Facebook page and give it a thumbs-up.  And naturally as a Senior Editor at AVfM, I recommend you take a look at what the SPLC and Norton Symantec call a →"Hate Group."

Oh, and while you're on Facebook, take a look at these pages:
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=660529757307186&set=a.111990072161160.15768.111962042163963&type=1&relevant_count=1

http://www.facebook.com/mensuck?fref=ts

http://www.facebook.com/pages/men-are-the-source-of-all-evil-or-shall-i-just-say-CS/110868285616325

http://www.facebook.com/pages/All-men-are-evil-and-will-act-upon-their-vicious-nature-if-given-the-chance/120775494673908

http://www.facebook.com/pages/I-Hate-Men/121104277931041

http://www.facebook.com/pages/i-hate-men/123497954342168

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Men-are-Evil/388676584573526

Help us kill the lie that men's human rights are the antithesis of women's human rights.


Monday, May 27, 2013

Hear Me Rawr!



I just sent this email to Samsung:
Dear Sir, 
I am disgusted by your recent misandrist commercial.  To whom are you pandering by showing a smug "superior" woman who fantasizes about using a male-invented product (which operates in conjunction with other male-invented products, using still other male-invented technologies) to transform a stereotypically "defective" man into a slave-like servant?  Let me guess.  You are trying to sell your product to useless "empowered" women who consider themselves naturally entitled to pampering and unqualified dominion over the men in their lives.  
May I suggest that this is a misguided marketing strategy?  The purchasing power of your targeted demographic will soon be dwindling, as the tightening economy will eventually result in drastically reduced monies to fund their cushy careers in HR, Non-Profits, and as do-nothing government clerks.  If you were to hire an adverting agency that has the foresight to reject the current cultural trend of man-bashing (good luck with that, but it's worth a try) you might be pleasantly surprised by the public response  from millions of real live men and women, who don't find that crap cute.  
In the meantime I refuse to spend even a dime on Samsung products.  I will also use my platforms in the Men's Human Rights Movement, to recommend that males and the women who respect males, boycott your company. 
Sincerely, 
Suzanne McCarley
Senior Editor, http://www.avoiceformen.com/Owner, http://shiningpearlsofsomething.blogspot.com/
Here's the address: samsungpr@edelman.com
 H/T Cappy Cap and TPM

Sunday, May 26, 2013

Parody or Good Old Fashioned Mental Illness?

I'm taking an informal poll.  This guy er dude um, person ?, obviously a "Man Boobs" reader (and quite typical of them, if I may say so) appears to have a rather low opinion of his own penis A Voice for Men.


→linky→"Suzanne McCarley, Senior Editor - Uncle Tom and peddler of women's bodies"←linky←

PAUL ELAM 

WE DEMAND YOU END THIS WEBSITE NOW

YOU HAVE 48 HOURS UNTIL OUR BOYCOTT OF YOU AND ANYONE ON YOUR SHOW. I WOULD BE HAPPY TO DISCUSS THE TERMS OF YOUR CLOSING OF YOUR WEBSITE IF YOU SO DESIRE. I DO NOT FEAR YOU.


and today:



THIS IS ME, DO I LOOK LIKE I AM JOKING MRAs???

No cheating.  Go follow the links and read his delusional brain-melting screed.  (OK, yes.  I'm biased; I vote "mental illness."  Because I don't think he's smart enough to achieve this level of parody.  Not intentionally anyway.)

Edited to add:
*sigh*
I outed the silly troll on his third post and he took down his blog withing ten minutes.  (The blog owner's name is "Kyle,"  he calls himself  "Tad," and the photo of his "boyfriend" La Donna is obviously Kyle/Tad wearing make-up.  Sorry if I spoiled your fun, Kyle/Tad/LaDonna!

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Mocking Jezebel, part "Whatever - This is Giving Me a Headache"


The Secret to a Happy Marriage Might Just Be Living Apart


Unless it's temporary, that's not a marriage, you moron.  

"Obvious," well, isn't anymore, is it?  When did this become the norm?

Cognitive Dissonance, via Judgy Bitch

→ →But...but...but...*stamps foot, flounces out, slams door*...Aarrgh!← ←

"We can have stores for fat people, and stores for all people, but we can’t have stores for thin people.
*
We can have gyms for everyone and gyms for women, but we can’t have gyms for men.
*
We can have clubs for everyone, and clubs for women, but we can’t have clubs for men.
*
We can have hockey teams for everyone, and hockey teams for girls, but we can’t have hockey teams for boys.
*
We can have rights for humans and we can have rights for women, but we can’t have rights for men.
*
Feminism: it really is a mental illness."
(...Or it could just be child's play - making it up as you go along, knowing the grownups will keep you safe when it doesn't all work out quite the way you imagined...)

Sunday, May 5, 2013

The Single Most Exquisite Diatribe Against Gun Control EVER

Barry Snell, from the Iowa State Daily                               H/T: Peter

This is so good I'm copy/pasting it, even though it's looooong.

Pour a drink and get comfortable:



Snell: Waking the dragon — How Feinstein fiddled while America burned

    May 3, 2013.


Along with bombs and bombers, guns seem to be all the media wants to talk about these days. Death is sexy to our miscreant media, especially when people are killed on purpose. And when that happens, it’s all the newspapers and news stations will print and broadcast, in turn making these events appear worse than they are in reality.  
To understand this, one need only look at the difference in coverage between the Texas fertilizer plant explosionwhich killed at least 14 confirmed people and injured 200 more at the time of writing this, versus the coverage of the Boston Marathon bombingwhich only killed three and injured a hundred others. Texas was on TV for a day, tops, while we’re still hearing about Boston and will for many weeks to come. 
Where the media really didn’t care too much about the Texas incident, once a kid was killed at a race, the Boston bombing is now a foil for everything from gun control to immigration in the wake of Sandy Hook, with both sides of the political spectrum using it against the other. What about Texas, you ask? Nothing but crickets chirping from the mainstream media at the moment. Recent studies have shown that people who consume large amounts of mass media often feel more insecure, are less informed, or can’t distinguish between news and what passes as news, what with all the opinion you’ll find in news today. 
But when it comes to something as deadly serious as guns and crime, Americans can’t afford the media hyperbole, misinformation and disinformation. 
We have a lot of liberal columnists working for the Daily. As a conservative, I’m fine with that; they’re the ones who apply for the job, and conservatives usually don’t. Free market, baby, deal with it. But many of our liberal columnists are my friends, with whom I have spent time outside of work, too. And they, along with everyone else it seems, have an opinion about guns, as you can see by glancing through the last few weeks of the Daily’s Opinion section. 
It’s been an eye-opening experience for me. As assistant opinion editor and friend, my columnists are important to me both professionally and personally. It’s all the more clear to me now after doing this job that people often opine a whole lot about stuff they don’t have any personal experience with or expertise on. Like guns.
Every time a gun issue comes up in conversation around Daily people or during a Daily editorial board meeting, opinion editor Michael Belding almost always tells me, “you should write a column about that!” I hesitate in doing so and have so far resisted the urge mostly; I wrote three gun-related columns back in 2011 and early 2012, and that was enough to brand me the “gun guy” by some folks who use such terms as epithets.
The desire of others for me to write gun columns is reasonable, though, and I understand it. I’m as much of a “gun expert” as you’re likely to find around here, so having me write about guns in the paper is perfectly rational. I won’t bore you with my “gun resume,” but suffice it to say that prior to coming to Iowa State in 2011, I made a living with firearms in one way or another for several years of my life, and have a few pieces of paper laying around that say I know a bit about them, too.
Today, however, I’m going to break my silence on the gun issue and speak out once more — and for the last time. This is my final column for the Iowa State Daily.
No experience necessary
In the gun debate, I’ve discovered that one cannot be expert enough about guns. Indeed, when it comes to the gun issue, opinion rules. There doesn’t seem to be any opportunity for any genuine, honest debate on guns, and even liberals would agree with that. I’ve often wondered about this over the years. Is it because my side of the debate is actually loony? I don’t think so; at least, I think I’m pretty normal. Sure, we’ve got some oddballs we all wish would go away, just like any group does.  
But all the pro-gun people I know are normal people too — people so normal that nobody knows they’re gun people until they’re told. In fact, there are so many gun owners that if we are all crazy like some suggest, the daily crime rate in America would look more like our crime rate for the entire decade combined, and CNN would actually have something to report on other than the latest gossip.
That is to say, there’s a hundred million of us, owning a few hundred million guns combined, and we contribute to society peacefully every day. Many of us even literally protect society for a living, or used to.
I’ve come to realize after the Sandy Hook shooting that the reason we can’t have a rational gun debate is because the anti-gun side pre-supposes that their pro-gun opponents must first accept that guns are bad in order to have a discussion about guns in the first place. Before we even start the conversation, we’re the bad guys and we have to admit it. Without accepting that guns are bad and supplicating themselves to the anti-gunner, the pro-gunner can’t get a word in edgewise, and is quickly reduced to being called a murderer, or a low, immoral and horrible human being.
You might think that’s hyperbole too, but I’ve experienced it personally from people I considered friends until recently. And every day I see it on TV or in the newspapers, from Piers Morgan to the Des Moines Register’s own Donald Kaul, who among others have actually said people like me are stupid, crazy or should be killed ourselves. YouTube is full of examples, and any Google search will result in example after example of gun-owning Americans being lampooned, ridiculed anddemonized by the media and citizens somewhere.  
Hell, it’s even gotten so bad that a little kid was expelled from school recently for biting a Pop Tart into the vague shape of a handgun during lunch break (it looked more like Idaho to me).
Liberals always make the common plea, “We need to get some experts to solve this problem!” for any public policy issue that comes along, which is a good thing. But when it comes to the gun issue, gun expertise is completely irrelevant to the anti-gunner — people who probably have never fired a gun or even touched one in real life, and whose only experience with guns is what they’ve seen in movies or read about in bastions of (un)balanced, hyper-liberal journalism, like Mother Jones. That a pro-gun person might actually know a lot about their hobby or profession doesn’t stand up against the histrionic cries of the anti-gunner.
How can we “gun people” honestly be expected to come to the table with anti-gunners when anti-gunners are willfully stupid about guns, and openly hate, despise and ridicule those of us who own them? There must first be respect and trust — even just a little — before there can be even the beginnings of legitimate discussion of the issue.
Death by a thousand cuts
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because anti-gunners always talk about 90 percent of Americans supporting this gun control measure, or 65 percent supporting that one, as if a majority opinion is what truly matters in America. We don’t trust anti-gun people because you think America is a democracy, when it’s actually a constitutional federal republic. In the American system, the rights of a single individual are what matters and are what our system is designed to protect. The emotional mob does not rule in America.  
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they keep saying they “respect the Second Amendment” and go on about how they respect the hunting traditions of America. We don’t trust you because you have to be a complete idiot to think the Second Amendment is about hunting. I wish people weren’t so stupid that I have to say this: The Second Amendment is about checking government tyranny. Period. End of story. The founders probably couldn’t have cared less about hunting since, you know, they just got done with that little tiff with England called the Revolutionary War right before they wrote that “little book” called the Constitution.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they lie to us. President Obama directly says he won’t tamper with guns or the Second Amendment, then turns around and pushes Congress to do just that. We don’t trust anti-gunners because they appoint one of the most lying and rabidly (and moronically) anti-gun people in America, Vice President Biden, to head up a “task force” to “solve” the so-called “gun problem,” who in turn talks with anti-gun special interest groups instead of us to complete his task.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they tell us they don’t want to ban guns, only enact what they call “common sense gun laws.” But like a magician using misdirection, they tell everyone else they want to ban every gun everywhere. While some are busy trying to placate us with lies, another anti-gunner somewhere submits a gun ban proposal — proposals that often would automatically make us felons for possession. Felons, for no good reason. And you anti-gunners can roll up your grandfather clauses and stuff them where the sun don’t shine. If it ain’t good enough for our grandchildren in 60 years, it ain’t good enough for us right now.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they make horrifying predictions about how there will be blood in the streets, gunfights on every street corner and America will become the Wild West again if citizens are allowed to carry concealed firearms. We don’t trust anti-gun people because we know that despite the millions of Americans who have carry permits, those who carry guns commit crimes at a much lower rate than people who don’t. We know because we know ourselves and we’re not criminals. We know because concealed carry is now legal nearly everywhere, and guess what? Violent crime continues to go down. What a shocker.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they say gun control is about crime control. Anti-gunners claim that ending crime and “saving children” is why they want to ban so-called “assault weapons.” Yet our very own government says that assault weapons are used in less than two percent of all gun crimes and Department of Justice studies say the last assault weapons ban had little or no effect on crime. Other studies suggest gun control may even make crime worse (one need only look to high crime rates in places where there’s a lot of gun control to see the possible connection).
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because when it comes to their “We need gun control to save the children” argument, many of us can’t understand how an anti-gun liberal can simultaneously be in favor of abortion. Because you know, a ban on abortion would save a child every single time. I’m personally not rabidly against abortion, but the discongruence makes less sense still when the reason abortions are legal is to protect a woman’s individual rights. That’s great, but does the individual rights argument sound familiar? Anti-gunners think that for some bizarre reason, the founding fathers happened to stick a collective right smack dab at the top of a list of individual rights, though. Yeah, because that makes sense.
Truth, treason and the empire of lies
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they are purposely misleading to rile the emotions of the ignorant. We don’t trust anti-gunners because they say more than 30,000 people are killed each year by guns — a fact that is technically true, but the key piece of information withheld is that only a minor fraction of that number is murder; the majority is suicides and accidents. We don’t trust anti-gunners because we know accidents and suicides don’t count in the crime rate, but they’re held against us as if they do.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because not only is the violent crime rate approaching historic lows, but mass shootings are on the decline too.  We don’t trust anti-gun people because they fail to recognize that mass shootings happen where guns are already banned — ridiculous “gun-free zones” which attract homicidal maniacs to perpetrate their mass shootings.  
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because school shootings have been happening forever, but despite them being on the decline, the media inflates the issue until the perception is that they’re a bigger problem than they really are. We don’t trust anti-gunners because they’re busy riling up the emotions of the ignorant, who in turn direct their ire upon us, demonizing us because we object to the overreaction and focus on the wrong things, like the mentally ill people committing the crimes.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they look down on us for defending the Second Amendment as vigorously as they defend the First Amendment — a fight we too would stand side-by-side with them on otherwise. We don’t trust anti-gunners because someone defending the First Amendment is considered a hero, but a someone defending the Second Amendment is figured down with murderers and other lowlifes. Where the First Amendment has its very own day andweek, both near-holy national celebrations beyond reproach, anti-gunners would use the First Amendment to ridicule any equivalent event for the Second Amendment, like they did for a recent local attempt at the University of Iowa.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because anti-gun people put us down with dismissals like “just another dumb redneck with a gun.” We are told all over the Internet that we deserve to be in prison for being awful, heartless people; baby-killers and supporters of domestic terrorism, even. We don’t trust anti-gun people because even our own president says people like me are “bitter” and “cling to our guns and religion.” One need only go to any online comments section of any recent gun article in any of the major newspapers to see all this for themselves.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they seek to punish us for crimes we didn’t commit. We don’t trust anti-gunners because we know that the 100 million of us are peaceful, law-abiding citizens who love this country and our society as much as the next liberal. Yet when one previously convicted felon murders someone with a stolen gun five days after his release from prison, or things like the Newtown shooting happen, guns are blamed — and therefore lawful gun owners too, as there is guilt by association, apparently.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because when things like the Boston Marathon bombing happen, everyone correctly blames the bomber, not the bomb. Nobody is calling for bomb control because killing people with bombs is already illegal — just like killing people with guns is illegal too.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they’re fine with guns protecting the money in our banks, our politicians and our celebrities, but they’re against us using guns to protect ourselves, our families, or even our children in schools. Legislative trolls like Dianne Feinstein cry havoc about me protecting my life, while standing comfortably behind armed guards —and the .38 Special revolver she got a California carry permit for. We don’t trust anti-gunners because they tell us our lives aren’t important, or at least are less important than the life of some celebrity like Snooki, who can have all the armed guards her bank account can afford.
A dangerous servant and fearful master
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they completely ignore the fact that true conservatism is about, in part, the preservation of traditions and long-standing principles. We don’t trust anti-gunners because the American Revolution was kicked off by an attempt at gun control when the British marched to Concord to seize the colonists’ muskets and powder. Since the shot heard ‘round the world was fired on Lexington Green, the possession of a firearm has been the mark and symbol of a citizen, distinguishing them from a subject of a monarchy or tyrannical government. We don’t trust anti-gunners because they prefer the post-modern world where anything means anything, and they therefore don’t understand the power of or need for the preservation of traditions — or at least, ones of which they don’t personally approve.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because in a single breath they tell us that the Second Amendment is irrelevant today and should be repealed because semi-automatic weapons didn’t exist when the Bill of Rights was written, then turn around and say the First Amendment protectsradio, television, movies, video games, the Internetdomain namesFacebook and Twitter. Carrying liberal logic on the Second Amendment through to the First Amendment, it would only cover the town crier, and hand-operated printing presses producing only books and newspapers, and nothing else.  Even anything written with a No. 2 pencil or ballpoint pen would not be included. And those of you belonging to religions that formed after the 1790s? You’re screwed under liberal logic, too.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because, while liberals seek to expand government regulation and services — things that may not be bad or ill-intended on their own — they simultaneously try to curtail the Second Amendment. We don’t trust anti-gun people for this reason because history shows us that every genocide and democide is preceded by expansion of government power and gun control. We don’t trust anti-gunners because here in America, gun control is rooted in slavery and racism, with some of America’s modern anti-gun laws being direct copies of former Nazi laws that banned gun possession for Jews, blacks, gays and other “undesirables.”
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because anti-gunners tell us that the police and military are the only people who should have guns (which is a joke in itself), and that we need to give up our own guns and trust the government. We don’t trust anti-gunners because we know that hundreds of millions of people have been killed by their own governments in the last century, and not a single law seeking to ban the government from possessing guns has ever been submitted. Yet when but a few thousand people are killed by civilian criminals, tens of millions of American citizens like myself who did not commit any crimes at all are subjected to gun restrictions and personal persecution at the hands of emotional anti-gun bigots.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because anti-gunners insult us for our opposition to the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (aka the “ATF”). We don’t trust anti-gunners because we know the ATF is hardly a law enforcement agency but is really a glorified tax collection agency that has abused, ruined the lives of, or murdered dozens of innocent gun owners through overzealous enforcement of gun-related tax and paperwork regulations. Just ask Louis Katona,Patty and Paul MuellerJohn Lawmaster, Tuscon Police Lt. Mike Lara or any of the dozens of other victims of criminal ATF agents. Where was the ACLU for all that? And it doesn’t help that President Obama tried to appoint known anti-gunner Andrew Traver to be the ATF director. Check out the ATF’s “Good Ol’ Boys Roundup,” “Project Gunrunner” scandal and their loss of department guns for a little F-Troop entertainment sometime, too.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because they always bemoan the NRA, claiming the NRA is the source of all their anti-gun legislation problems. We don’t trust anti-gunners because it never occurs to them that perhaps it’s not the NRA per se that has the power, but the millions of members that belong to it, and the millions more Americans who otherwise support it and its mission. The NRA is probably the largest private organization in America; maybe that has something to do with its influence...? We also don’t trust anti-gunners because they’re too ignorant to understand that the NRA only represents a minority of us anyway.
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because while they were crying about the victims of 9/11 or Aurora or Sandy Hook, and thanking God they weren’t there, I and many other gun people like me were crying because we weren’t there, and asked God why we couldn’t have been. Many of us wish we were on one of the 9/11 airplanes, and not because we have a death wish but because we have a life wish. Because when we sit in silence and the world’s distractions fall away, the thought creeps in: Could I have made a difference?
Gun people don’t trust anti-gun people because I and many of us are what they call “sheepdogs” and we’re proud of that. Yet anti-gunners make fun of us, calling us “cowboys” and “wannabes” for it. Wanting to save lives and being willing to sacrifice one’s own to do it used to be considered a virtue in this country. Anti-gunners think they have the moral outrage, but the moral outrage is ours. I have never expressed any of these feelings openly to anyone because they are private and deeply personal. Screw you for demeaning us and motivating me to speak them.
Do unto others
No, anti-gunners, we don’t trust you. And you’ve given us no reason to, either. We gun owners obey the law each and every day, same as you. We defend your nation, protect your communities, teach your children, take care of you when you’re sick, defend you when you go to court or prosecute those who do you wrong. We cook and serve your food, haul and deliver your goods, construct your homes, unclog your sewers, make your electricity, and build or fix your cars.
We are everywhere and all around you, and we exist with you peacefully. You are our friends, neighbors and countrymen, and we are these things proudly. We mourn with you when radicals crash airplanes into our buildings, when hurricanes destroy the lives of our people, or when the criminal and mentally ill kill dozens of our school children. We cheer with you when USA wins the gold medal, when terrorists like Bin Laden are brought to justice, or when we land a machine built by American hands on Mars.
So what more can we do to earn your trust, your love and your acceptance other than surrender our rights, bow down to you and take your non-stop attacks?
Anti-gunners label people like me “gun nuts” even though we're anything but nutty. Our enjoyment of firearms doesn’t define us; it is but a single value and right we enjoy and cherish, among many other rights and values we enjoy and cherish — including the very same ones anti-gunners do too — like the First Amendment and the rest of the Bill of Rights.
No, anti-gunners are absolutely right: There can be no rational debate on this issue anymore. Anti-gunners don’t understand guns, they don’t understand crime, they don’t understand American history and traditions, they don’t understand gun owners and don’t care to understand us, and they reduce people like me to a debasing label or a number they’ve got no clue about.  
Anti-gunners reject our passions, our traditions, our knowledge, our experiences, our beliefs, our wisdom, our rights. Anti-gunners reject our very individuality by reducing us to labels, stereotypes and false or distorted statistics. Screw you for destroying that individuality and denying our humanity.
I am proudly one of many: a caring, friendly, loyal and loving human being.  I am an educated and intelligent person, and while I may not be the best-looking guy, friends tell me I have a great personality (yay?). Perhaps more importantly though, I am a proud citizen of this country, and I’d perform any sacrifice for others so that they may not themselves have to sacrifice.  
And unlike most anti-gunners, it seems, I have served my community and nation in various roles throughout the years — roles that, ironically, often entailed guns. Where I was once given a uniform and a gun, and trusted with it to ensure the safety and security of others, I am now a pariah among many of the very people I sacrificed for. I am sadly one of many here, too. What a terrible, hurtful insult and betrayal!
An anti-gunner reads a book though, or sees a documentary on TV — or perhaps worst of all, gets a degree — and suddenly they have the almighty authority and expertise to tell us how we ought to live our lives, replying to our objections to their onslaught by throwing pictures of dead kids in our faces and commanding us to shut up, because we’re just a bunch of stupid radicals and liberals alone know what’s best for America.
You anti-gunners out there will lead us down a path you do not want to go down. Your lack of care and understanding of those who abide by America’s oldest and deepest-rooted tradition will cause a social rift in this country of the likes we have never seen in America’s young history. Your lack of understanding chances causing a civil war — a civil war that will be far worse, more acrimonious, more prolonged and more deadly than the last one.
Anti-gunners may think the military could prevent such a thing — an argument often used against us pro-gunners — but with only a few million people in the military, and with the United States containing 300 million citizens spread across nearly four million square miles, many of whom are themselves veterans, well, military occupation of this country is impossible. It doesn’t help that most street cops (opposed to their politician bosses) are pro-gun, too. And what happens when the civilian industries that support the military stop producing the supplies our military needs?
The rift is already beginning. We must mend fences...Now.
Sleeping dragons and terrible resolve
I do not want to live through a war in my own backyard. I do not want our children to grow up in such an America, either. So anti-gunners: Please stop, I beg you. See the writing on the wall before it’s too late.  
Yes, there is a terrible crime problem, and yes, that problem sometimes involves guns — but it is the perpetrator that is the problem, not the instrument. Yes, there is a great divide between liberals and conservatives on the issue of guns. And while I will be the very first person to criticize the Republican Party on its many and frequent mistakes, and even stand with my democratic friends in my disfavor of those things, on the gun issue it is not the conservatives who are mostly in the wrong this time.
We want the crime and killings to stop as much as you do, so to my fellow citizens who are anti-gun I say: So long as you deny our humanity, so long as you malign our dignity, intelligence and wisdom, so long as you seek to shade us under a cloud of evil that we do not partake in or support, so long as you tell us that because we own guns we are terrible people, you will prove yourselves absolutely right in that we won’t come to the table to talk with you.
And there will be no hope for resolution but through victory by force initiated by one side or the other, God help us, for we will not plow for those who didn’t beat their swords into plowshares.
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